“Sigma Males” Don’t Exist

I like Vox’s Alpha-Omega male classification system.  I do.  It’s much more interesting and descriptive than the typical Alpha-male / Beta-male descriptors.

I will point you to his article for the list.  It’s on the blog “Alpha Game Plan.”  The original post was in 2011 and since then has been talked about a fair amount on various other blogs and forums:

http://alphagameplan.blogspot.com/2011/03/socio-sexual-hierarchy.html

Instead of the typical binary “Alpha = stud” and “Beta = dud” meme, Vox breaks things down into six groupings: Alpha, Beta, Delta, Gamma, Omega, and “Sigma.”  (His seventh category, “Lambda,” seems to be a euphemism for gays and won’t be addressed here.)

I won’t argue with Alpha through Omega.  These seem like decent descriptors of their relative male categories.

However, his concept of the “Sigma Male,” the guy who stands apart from the Alpha-Omega classification hierarchy, who does his own thing, and who magically winds up with hot chicks, is utter bullshit.

Accord to Vox, a Sigma is “the outsider who doesn’t play the social game, [yet manages] to win at it anyhow.”  “[Sigmas] are at the top of the social hierarchy despite their refusal to play by its rules.”  Yeah right.  And I’m Batman.

When I first read the description of the Sigma male I laughed out loud.  No doubt the author, Vox, saw himself as this special sort of “Sigma” character.  The kick-ass lone wolf who can out-game even the popular guys.  I have no doubt his “Sigma” character is Vox’s own fantasy of the person he desperately wishes he were.

But it’s bullshit.

The “Sigma Male” is the dream of Gamma and Omega Males everywhere.   Wow.. I can be aspie as fuck, a complete social outcast, not have any friends… and still bang hot chicks??  And be more awesome than even alpha males??  Sign me up!!

Fact is, nobody stands apart from the hierarchy.  You’re in it whether you want to be or not.  If you try to stand apart from the herd, you are simply forgotten and wind up as low or lower than the omegas.  Sorry, it’s true.  Look at any hermit, social outcast, or crazy homeless guy and you’re not going to see some loner rebel stud who has magical effects on women; you’re just going to see some crazy dude with delusions of his own importance in the world.

The Sigma Male is a pathetic fantasy.  And really, it’s a pretty embarrassing one.  It’s as bad as pretending that you’re a powerful spellcaster, a sexy vampire, or the captain of a starship.  If you find yourself identifying with it, you should suck it up and realize that you’re actually just a Gamma or Omega and either accept that fact or try to improve yourself.

But believing that you’re somehow this awesome “Sigma Male” who can show up alone to the cool-kids’ party and all the hottest chicks will be checking you out due to your mysterious, lone-wolf persona… that’s just retarded.  Please stop deluding yourself.

Female Hypergamy Must Be Stopped or We’ll All Die!!!!!1111

Oh no it’s “female hypergamy,” that bogeyman tormenting Men’s Rights bloggers since they came up with the name!

You see, apparently western civilization is facing a crisis that, if left unchecked, will doom us all.  That’s the recent, modern and oh so liberal phenomenon of *gasp* women trying to marry men who are extremely desirable!

Call the press!  Call the police!  The plague is spreading and will consume us all!

Never in the history of mankind have women attempted to “marry up.”  Never.  It’s all a result of feminism, you see.  Females have gotten all hypergamous, you see.  “Hyper” meaning, like, “up” or something, and “gamous” meaning, uh.. marriage, right?

And this is really bad because of Briffault’s Law that states that women, and women alone, interact with others only when it benefits them.  Because we all know that men — as the logical and rational sex — will associate with everyone everywhere whether it benefits them or not.   That’s because men are logical and women emotional.  Every one of them.  Every man is 100% logical, and every woman is 100% emotional, all the time.

Logic and emotions use different parts of the brain, see.  And men don’t have those parts that women have and vice versa.  It’s a wonder that men and women can even breed because it seems we’re different species!  Men are like the super awesome species with strength and logic and women are a whole ‘nother different species that’s weak and emotional and.. and.. hypergamous!

Greed, that’s what it is.  Greed.  All because of feminism.  Feminism has made women greedy when in the olden days before those bad feminists came along women were all wonderful and giving.  And they were chaste and wonderful and sweet.  And wonderful.  And they mated with none-too-special guys like me!  They didn’t try for what they couldn’t get.  They could only get average guys like myself and they were happy with those guys and they cooked and cleaned and did what they were told and they didn’t talk back!  Ever!

Then feminism came along and look where we are now!  Women, going to college more than men, getting cooler jobs than men, not doing what they’re told anymore, not being willing to have sex with guys like me!  I hate them all!!

I hate them I hate themIhatethem!!!!!

But I have a solution!  Hear me brethren!  The solution is this: let’s just make women start listening to us again.  Even more, let’s make women start obeying us again.  I’m not really sure how to do it but that’s the plan anyway.  Because if I’m in charge.. I mean we.. If we’re in charge again and women have to do what we say, then the world will be a much better place again.  Like it was in the olden days when there was no crime or slavery or genocide or violence or bad marriages or shitty reality shows on practically every fucking channel what the fuck!!

That’s it.  That’s the solution.  The final solution!  We must band together, gentlemen. It’s women who’ve gotten uppity.  Women who’ve put us in this hellhole of a society.  Every bad thing that’s ever happened is because of women, and every good thing is because of men like you and I.. or is that you and me?  Doesn’t matter!

So remember that, lads.  Remember!  As we take back this society from women.  You and I, the two of us.  Men together.  Men forever.  No girls allowed!

Unless they want to have sex with me.

OKCupid’s “Crazy Blind Date” is as misguided as Windows 8

I’ve been doing online dating regularly since 2002.  And I even dabbled with it somewhat back in ’99 and ’00 when Yahoo Personals was still free.  I’ve sent thousands of emails and perused tens of thousands of profiles on pretty much every online dating site that’s popped up and faded away over the years.  And I’ve dated and banged dozens of chicks from those sites in that time.

That’s why it pains me to see that OKCupid.com has rolled out a harebrained idea called “Crazy Blind Date.”  Actually, it thrills me because I delight in Schadenfreude.  Speaking of Schadenfreude, have you tried Windows 8?  OKCupid’s shitty new dating idea reminds me a lot of it.

Just as Windows 8 attempts to “simplify” your user experience by taking away choices, so does Crazy Blind Date.  Want to set up an ad hoc wireless network in Windows 8?  Tough shit!  Want to see the person you’ll waste your Saturday night with on OKCupid?  Double tough shit!

Let’s look at why CBD sucks:

1)  Most people who do online dating are fat and/or ugly.  Sorry, had to be said.  I’ve spent untold man-hours “hiding” thousands of OKC users I would never, under any circumstances, stick my dick into.  Hot girls know they’re hot and put as many pics of themselves up as possible.  Only the fuglies don’t have pics.  Now they expect me to go out with someone who has a 95% chance of being one of these unfuckable broads?  Hell no.

2) Men usually pay for dates.  Despite the advances of feminism, which I truly love, men are still usually expected to pay for a first night out.  So now I’m paying for a date with some unknown she-beast who will cause my cock to shrivel once I get a good view of her?  Yeah… no.

3) The name is terrible.  “Crazy Blind Date.”  Crazy?  Really?  “Crazy” and “Blind Date” are not words I want anywhere near each other.   That’s like “Crazy Ex-Wife,” “Crazy Driver,” or “Crazy Mother-in-Law.”  These are bad terms to put together.  When I think of a “crazy” blind date I think of someone who kidnaps me, throws me in the trunk of a car, then leaves me blindfolded in a dumpster behind Jack in the Box after rifling through my wallet and pissing on my head.  This is not the kind of date I’m looking for.

4) The idea of Crazy Blind Date is that people will go out on some lukewarm pisser of a coffee date or something every single day of the week (read the press releases and interviews.)  I don’t know about you, but I simply don’t have the time or interest to do this.  I want to meet chicks who are attractive and fuckable and who want to screw me too, and if it turns into something more… great.  I’m certainly not going to spend my precious time going out with women for an endless string of boring first-dates, one after another after another.

5) This is purely a money-making ploy for OKCupid.  Much like Windows 8 — which is an attempt to move sheep consumers into a paradigm where they have to buy everything through an Apple-like “Windows Store” — Crazy Blind Date is not OKC’s attempt to solve any perceived need within the online dating community.  It’s simply an attempt to generate new revenue.

See, once you’ve gone out on your boring date with your new 300lb friend, you’re then expected to give OKC some of your money to rate the person or whatever.  I’m not really sure how it works and I really don’t give a shit.  But it’s clear that they’re promoting this scheme so hard that the owners of the company must need new Jaguars or something.

6) I want more choices, not fewer.  Just as Microsoft has finally, officially jumped the shark by releasing an operating system that simplifies stuff so much that most of the screen is filled with absolutely nothing, OKC seems to think that people encounter “too much information” online.   Therefore, just eliminate choices!  Who needs to see what the other person looks like or what they have to say on their profile?  That stuff shouldn’t be important to you anyway.  You’re just a lowly sheep consumer, so shut the fuck up and take what we give you.  We want more money and your ass is lucky to have anything at all, and don’t you forget it.

Honestly, the beauty of internet dating is that you can kind of figure out what the other person is like before you even meet.  You can eliminate tons and tons of people without wasting more time than the 5-15 seconds it takes to read their profile and look at their pics.  That is the one and pretty much only positive side to online dating.  Why would you want to remove that?  Makes no sense.

Note to technology companies: I’m not an idiot, there is not “too much information” or “too many choices” out there.  Sifting through a shit-ton of data every day is what it means to live in the 21st century.  If you are unable or unwilling to do so, join the Amish.  Give me more options, not fewer!

Just as Windows 8 is Microsoft’s cynical attempt to push its Windows Phone, its Windows Tablet, and its Windows Store rather than deliver a useful and cutting-edge operating system, OKCupid’s “Crazy Blind Date” is more of an attempt to generate another revenue stream for the company than actually enhance the dating experience.

Which is sad because it’s not like “free” online dating sites are lacking in money-making potential.  They generate huge amounts of revenue for their owners without having to push anything other than ads.  And the OKC matching system is one that actually works because it gives — what’s that? — choices!  You can answer 1000 matching questions or zero.  The more effort you put into it, the better your matches will be.  Why would they come up with something that throws all that away?  No idea.

The funniest part to me was the day OKC scrambled everyone’s online dating photos to promote their new shitty service.  It was supposed to last the whole day, but only lasted a couple of hours before they restored everyone’s photos.  I have a feeling that the backlash or user dropoff was so great that they had to nix that idea.

Nobody but the worst kind of bored attention-whores would want to go out with people they can’t see or know anything about before the date, and then pay to “rate” them afterward.  Do you really think you’ll have a shot with a girl who’s been out with 5 guys in 5 days and is pushing each of them to “rate” her highly so that she can go on even more dates?  If so, I’ve got a bridge to sell you.

So just as Windows 8 was a huge clusterfuck of a mistake based upon the concept that “users are idiots,” Crazy Blind Date takes that philosophy to the online dating world and turns out to be a huge turd of a product as well.  I predict it will be scrubbed from the site within 6 months, and frankly it was probably designed to only last that long.  But both products, the new Windows and OKC’s new dating paradigm, will do what they’re supposed to do in the meantime: generate lots of $$$ for their creators until the public takes a deep breath and realizes that they simply suck.

Taking choices away from people is never a good long-term strategy.

Plenty of Fish – fix ‘unable to hide or unhide profile’ problem

So the morons over at POF.com have been working for at least six nine twelve months to figure out why some users’ ability to hide or unhide their profiles is broken. When you go to “Edit Profile” there should be a little one-line link in the middle of the page saying “To hide/unhide your profile CLICK HERE.”  For many people this link is missing, meaning that if their profile is hidden they can’t unhide it, and vice-versa.

There’s a thread in the support forums with more than 14,000 20,000 views and 8 9 pages of complaints about this issue and yet the illustrious programmers can’t even figure out their own HTML code to make it work right.  The mods and admins have been so unhelpful that it’s comedic, like some sort of incompetent bureaucratic Keystone Kops reel.

One person apparently posted a “link” several months ago that was probably the same as what’s below, but the administrators of the site told the mods to take down the link and give a “lifetime ban” to anybody who reposts it.  WTF?  What kind of fucked up shit is that?  Which is why I’m posting it here and not there.

Anyway here’s the fix, kludgy as it may be.   Took me about 5 minutes to figure out.  Simply log into your POF account and type in the following to your URL bar (or click on the following links):

To hide:  http://www.pof.com/editprofile.aspx?HideProfile=1

To UNhide:  http://www.pof.com/editprofile.aspx?HideProfile=0

You won’t get any confirmation or anything.  But I’ve tried it on a profile that doesn’t have the problem and the line saying “To unhide your profile CLICK HERE” switches to “To hide your profile CLICK HERE” and back again, so that tells me it’s working.  And I tried it on a broken, hidden profile and now I’m getting some messages, so I believe it’s not hidden anymore.

I guess it’s not technically a “fix” to their ridiculous bug, but it is a workaround.

Try it.

EDIT:

This workaround absolutely works.  You can see for yourself by searching for your username.  If it’s hidden, it won’t show.  UNhide it via the method above.  Search again.  You’ll see it.  If it’s currently unhidden, do the opposite.

EDIT 2:

It appears that, as some users with this problem on the POF forums have noted, after a day or so the site re-hides your profile if you’ve unhidden it.  Unbelievable.  Either the programmer(s) at POF are complete imbeciles (which wouldn’t surprise me), or something even stranger is going on.  Either way, it appears one either has to go in and manually do the above workaround every day or two, or one has to automate a macro to do it.

EDIT 3:

A direct link to this article is http://matingmarket.wordpress.com/2012/11/15/plenty-of-fish-unable-to-hide-or-unhide-profile-fix/

The “3-Date Rule” is for Betas

Heartiste’s blog talks about the 3-Date vs the “4-Date” Rule here: http://heartiste.wordpress.com/2012/09/11/the-4-date-misrule

Misses the point, of course.  If you’re still waiting 3 dates for sex, you’re a chump and a beta.  Here’s the response I wrote before re-realizing that for some reason I’ve been banned from posting comments on Heartiste’s blog.  Thankfully I copied and pasted it into Notebook before submitting the comment.

————————————————-

I don’t wait more than one date.  I screen heavily before then and if she doesn’t put out on date one I’ve got a half dozen more chicks waiting in the wings.  I haven’t broken this rule in a couple of years now, except for 2 chicks I dumped after date one for not putting out and they emailed me a couple of weeks later with an invitation to come over and nail them, which I did.

Not to say this always works — I’ve missed lays with cute girls that would have happened on subsequent dates — but my confidence shoots sky-high when I can dump a chick after one date, knowing I’ve got plenty of others to choose from.  Imagine the mental fortitude required to dump an 8 who’s into you but won’t put out on the first date.

HB8: “I really like you but I’m not the kind of girl who sleeps with guys on the first date.  Next time though… (wink wink).

YOU: “Sorry toots, it was now or never.  Bye bye.”

It’s a trip, and I firmly believe it makes you more attractive to women.  How many guys have the nuts to dump a good looking girl who wants to screw them but wants to do it next time rather than this time?  How many?  What kind of guy would do that?  What kind of options must he have?

There is no substitute for plenitude.  None.

————————————————-

If you read my last post you’ll realize I haven’t followed up and posted my prediction that came true.  I will, I’m just doing other stuff right now.

Reposting some of my stuff from Sosuave

So I’m pretty done with Sosuave.com.  It’s the only “seduction” forum I’ve been a part of in years and it’s gotten quite awful, as they all tend to.   There are essentially two or three types of posters.  The first are old misogynist trolls who post several new threads a day along the lines of “Are all women stupid whores?”   The second are young noobs who post questions that have been answered a billion times.  The following topics make my skin crawl:

1) There’s this one girl at school…

2) There’s this one girl at work…

3) There’s this one girl at the coffee shop…

Then of course there are teenagers who write up long posts attempting to “educate” the world with their vast knowledge of women but which just rehash 1000 bromides.  Those might be the silliest.

The problem with the internet is that everyone has a voice, even those who don’t deserve one.  I guess the worst part for me is that I’ll take time to post an interesting topic, or answer a question thoughtfully, and my post will either be misconstrued, attacked, trolled, or completely ignored.  I feel like I’m casting pearls before swine and I’m just bored with the lack of quality thought there.

The upshot of all this is that over the next few weeks & months I’ll be looking back through my old posts there, fishing out anything I think might be interesting, and posting it here.  If I feel it needs commentary I will provide it.  Obviously there won’t be any discussion by others of it here, but by the time I post something online I’ve thought about it in so much depth that I don’t really believe any discussion is necessary.  And furthermore, I’ve seen comments on internet blogs.  They’re uniformly awful, perhaps worse than in forums.  Which is why they’re not allowed here.

So this way I can at least have a record of the stuff I’ve posted over the past two years, and I might come to some insights about my own thoughts and behaviors in that time period.

I’d like to take my ideas and use them to springboard into advanced topics, but the inability of most folks to understand and process new ideas has heretofore prevented that.  If there are any insights to be provided, looks like I’ll have to provide them myself.

In my next post I’ll talk about one insight that I already provided years ago, and which was only recently scientifically proven.

Why has the Seduction Community been overrun by the Men’s Rights Movement?

Back when I got interested in seduction, I was 20 years old and going through a breakup with a girlfriend, and wanted to learn how to get laid by more chicks.  At least I think that was the reason.  It could be I just stumbled upon Ross Jeffries’ “Get Laid” Newsletters on the primitive mid-90s Internet and thought they were funny and interesting.

That was almost a half a lifetime ago.  The purpose was to bang chicks easily.  I read and read and wrote and wrote about “game” and “seduction” on all sorts of internet forums.  At no time were politics or discussions about society included, other than what was necessary to understand seduction techniques.

Then something changed.  I guess I’m a slow learner, because only recently has it become clear to me that somehow the Men’s Rights Movement (which I have very little interest in or knowledge about) has co-opted the Seduction Community.

No longer is seducing broads and banging chicks about personal pleasure and fun, now it’s some sort of grand statement about mankind as a whole.  Specifically, it seems, we are using “game” not to just get a chick’s clothes off, but to completely subjugate the entire female gender.

This comes as news to me.  I guess I’m years behind the curve.

Roosh V’s blog says:

The term “manosphere” is generally applied to any game or men’s right blog that goes against mainstream thinking of pedestalizing women at the expense of men.

[...] I have found an article that effortlessly ties in all our beliefs. It makes it clear what we stand for while offering one devastating argument after another against feminist thinking.

From http://www.rooshv.com/the-manosphere-for-dummies

Umm.. ok.  I didn’t know that my attempts to get laid without jumping through hoops and spending a shit-ton of cash had such political and sociological ramifications.  And frankly I don’t really care.

“Roosh” goes on, quoting a manosphere site…

‘Beta males who were told to follow a responsible, productive life of conformity found that they were swindled.’

The author describes the climate that gave rise to game and guys like me, even though he gets a bit moral about its application. By teaching you game, I hope that you will avoid a fate that befall many men in America.

Wow ok.   What “gave rise” to guys like me was the desire to fuck lots of chicks.  That’s it.

Well, perhaps I’ve been running game for so long that I simply don’t identify with “beta males” the world over.  As stated before in this blog I have no desire to get married, no desire to have kids, no desire to own a home, and little desire to interact meaningfully with society other than making enough money to allow me to live and bang chicks.  And play some tennis too, I love that shit.  Super fun and great exercise.

All this hand-wringing seems rather unenlightened to me.  Yeah, now’s a bad time to get married and have kids.  For many reasons, not just because of “feminism.”  But who really wants to do that anyway?  Do men really still desire a wife and a family?  I haven’t desired any of that … ever.

Furthermore, in reading “manosphere” blogs they all seem to be written by right-wingers.  I’m a liberal (bordering on libertarian) white-collar atheist living in a huge metropolis on the West coast.   Not exactly a recipe for conservatism.  Traditional and, especially, religious values have absolutely zero influence on my life.  So no, I’m not going to agree that we should go back to an age where women were barefoot and pregnant.  Traditional gender roles suck, because they impose too many restrictions … ON ME.   I don’t want to be a breadwinner, I don’t want to be a husband, I don’t want to be a father.  And I don’t want to have to pretend to want those things just to get pussy.

Personally, I’d love the feminist movement to become even more radicalized.  I’d love it if women slaved away at jobs and my role was simply to look good and fuck great.  I’d love that.  Are you kidding me?  That would be my dream come true.  Women hitting on me, chasing me, buying me drinks, driving me around, and having sex with me without any desire for marriage or children or commitment.  That’s my heaven.  I’m a pimp at heart baby.

Here’s the first sentence from the article that Roosh links to above:

Why does it seem that American society is in decline…

From http://www.singularity2050.com/2010/01/the-misandry-bubble.html

It doesn’t, numbnuts!  I banged 12 different chicks in the past 12 months.  American society is looking pretty damn good to me.

Then it occurred to me: Fascism has co-opted seduction!  There’s no other term for it.  Gender fascism.

Basically fascism goes like this: “There is a problem with this world, and it’s caused by _________________.”

Fill in the blank with your “ism” of choice.  Feminism, communism, judaism, multiculturalism … whatever.  The first thing you need to do is convince people there’s a problem.  Then you lay the blame.  Then you fire up the ovens.

But then I started thinking.  Maybe I’m the face of the manosphere itself.  Maybe I look down on it because it seems unevolved to me.  I don’t identify with “beta” males and can’t remember a time when I ever did.  Yes, I was kind of geeky and not very good with women as a teen and I didn’t have that many girls even into my 20s, but I never saw myself as a “victim.”  I always figured I could do better at seduction.  Maybe I “swallowed the red pill” so early in life, and have been living that way so long (17 or so years), that I no longer feel oppressed by anything or anyone.  Maybe I think men’s rights are lame because I’ve already progressed far past them!

Beta males who were told to follow a responsible, productive life of conformity found that they were swindled.

I don’t remember ever being told to follow a responsible, productive life of conformity.   And if I ever was, I don’t remember ever obeying or even caring what other people told me to do.  And I’ve never felt swindled by women, society, or anyone.

Rather, I feel like this is a perfect time for guys like me.  I feel like it’s a time when single men are more free than any other time in human history.  I can bang chicks without worrying about having to marry them and without wanting to start a family with them, and without having to buy them tons of shit.

I guess I just don’t understand the anger of the manosphere.  I seduce women because I like sex and I like having it with as many chicks as possible without spending too much time or money.  Period.  I don’t do it to make a political statement, I don’t do it to defeat “feminism,” and I certainly don’t do it because I feel oppressed by anyone.

I do it for fun.  Manosphere writers seem so grim.  No fun at all.

I wish I knew how the Seduction community got overrun by these knuckleheads.  Seduction is about sex and having a good time, not about “getting back” at women.  Not about belittling them or subjugating them.  The end goal is sex, not dominance.  Certainly not revenge.

Anyway I find it strange.  I was hoping to come to some sort of conclusion here but I guess I can’t.  Maybe I was steeped in Seduction before it became a political statement and therefore the manosphere makes no sense to me.  Maybe I’m just successful at seduction whereas these guys aren’t, and so they’re bitter and I’m not.  Maybe I just avoided the pitfalls that they didn’t and so I can’t feel their pain.  Maybe alphas can never understand what it’s like to be a beta. ;)

I just don’t know.  I hope I never understand them, because quite honestly they seem like real downers.